So when all is said and done we translate the number of times a ball has landed in the back of a net, past and present, and somehow work out why it was so obviously going to be so and what will happen in the future!! That’s the unenviable task of our resident expert Professor Statto, Nobel Prize Winner in waiting, who’s been explaining the meaning of football life and giving comfort to his followers for years.
He’ll tell you why your predictions were bound to be wrong. He’ll tell you about the most outrageous possibilities to come. He’ll tell you…But whatever he says remember:
“98% of all statistics are made up.” ~Author Unknown
Professor Statto and his amazing statistics.
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Previous analysis
Week 21.... FA Cup Round 3.... Weeks 19 and 20.... Week 18.... Week 17.... Week 16
Good day, all
The Man.Utd-Chelsea game was a landmark in the Premier League, and not only because it decided who owns this season’s bragging rights between the two titans. Every team has now reached the halfway point in their campaign, though United and Fulham are lagging a couple of games behind most others. We don’t have any clearer idea who the champions will be; in fact, we have even less idea than a month ago now the Big Four have allowed Aston Villa to make it the Big Five.
There’s still a logjam among the strugglers, who, by almost universal agreement, begin with Hull in 8th place. On this basis Everton (6th) and Wigan (7th) are the only teams not challenging for the title or fighting against The Drop. I haven’t seen any managerial pronouncements about targeting a UEFA Cup place. Maybe the thought of continental visits at today’s pound/euro exchange rate is too painful to contemplate.
The Big Five Dozen?
The Premier League season is often compared to a marathon: aspiring Score Five champions too need the distance runner’s qualities of determination and perseverance. Some early sprinters have fallen by the wayside. Remember The Gaffer, who rocketed away at the start with scores of 37 and 26? This Score Five business must have looked so easy, but he crashed horribly with 3 and then 4 pts in the next two weeks, and hasn’t been heard of since. Other early notables who have now fallen off the pace include Heskey, johnnybhk and cyprusboro. Varora and Marcockh were duelling for the leadership in November, but both have now fallen out of the Top 100.
While some faltered, others have moved up the field. Today’s No. 2, Patrick Ho, didn’t reach the Top 20 until late November, but he has been a fixture since. Antomeno, lano23, nick1, kevin and monthly winners Len and The Athlone Boys have all steadily advanced.
Of those who started strongly, Simoscy has never wavered. He won the first monthly prize and shows every sign of playing some part when the finish line comes into view. Johnw, Doni Alfauzi, Michael, Gilberto’s Goldmine and Katona777 are other front runners notable for their endurance.
If there are only five possible winners of the Prem, I can see at least five dozen contenders at the halfway stage in our own competition. A third of our Top 60 have used all of their Five Lives, and some are already restricted to battling for the monthly prizes – that’s a golden opportunity for their competitors. There are only a couple of dozen players in the Top 100 with four or five lives still intact: they’re moving up the leaderboard week by week – the value of consistency, pals.
Apart from our champion’s crown, there are still four monthly and three FA Cup prizes to play for. The race is still wide open: within a month, a player can move 50 places up or down the Global League table - are you ready to make your move?
The Archers: a story of every-game folk
Whatever sort of competition you’re involved in – sports, online gaming, a quiz league – there are some opponents who you know will always be there, battling away, making life difficult for you, never giving you a moment’s peace. We have them in ScoreFive too. Ladies and Gentlemen, I invite you to appreciate the ever-competitive Len and his colleagues at the Archer League. The seven of them are steadily climbing the Global League ladder, and in our first five months, none of them has missed a week’s predictions! Respect is due to Len (global #3), andeebuboy (#51), helloarthur2000 (#81), Philps (#82), Laarni (#94), Stuart (#115) and Enid (#117). They remind me of Brad Friedel – top professional, consistent performer, and of course, never misses a game.
Top Players
The Premier League served up what was for most of you an agreeable selection of fixtures last weekend. With only a couple of surprise scorelines, the majority of you banked points in the high teens at least. Technically, the round isn’t over yet (I’m writing this before the result of Wednesday’s Man. Utd-Wigan game is known) so barring a surprise, we’ll probably have a record haul of 20-plussers for what is only a nine-game week.
That Stoke-Liverpool draw was the stumbling block for almost everyone, and no-one expected Man. Utd to have such a decisive win against Chelsea - I doubt even Fergie did! I couldn’t find a single player who got the full five points from either game. In fact, only irishgeordie managed five between them, having bravely gone for the draw at Stoke together with a Man. U. home win.
The magic number for a place at the top table this week is 22 pts and up.
|
Player
|
League
|
Supports
|
Pts
|
|
Numba 1
|
Newcastle GS
|
The Toon
|
25
|
|
Mis Hammerette
|
Pearly
|
The Hammers
|
24
|
|
Philps
|
Archer
|
Arsenal
|
24
|
|
Gilberto's Goldmine
|
Arsenal GS
|
Arsenal
|
24
|
|
irishgeordie
|
FSF
|
Coleraine
|
23
|
|
The Wanderer
|
Public
|
Wolves
|
22
|
Every chance you’ll be able to play in the Wolves GS League next season, Wanderer!
By the way, Gilberto’s Goldmine has another reason to be cheerful – he’s just won our FA Cup Third Round prize with a total of 79 pts.
Let the stats speak for you
Chelsea fans weren’t the only ones annoyed by Didier Drogba’s poor performance at Old Trafford on Sunday. If we can believe this week’s press, Nicolas Anelka, left out of the starting eleven for the last three games, let Big Phil know he wasn’t impressed either, in what we’re told became a heated argument. The Incredible Sulk, as he’s known in some quarters, could have saved himself some earache and the Boss’s wrath. He should simply have jotted down a few appearance stats and left the note on Scolari’s desk. Something like this would have sufficed:
|
Player
|
Prem
|
FA Cup
|
Lge Cup
|
Goals
|
Mins. played per goal
|
|
Anelka
|
22
|
0
|
0
|
14
|
105
|
|
Drogba
|
10
|
1
|
2
|
2
|
350
|
While the Drog’s record this term is less than impressive, he’s not the worst in the top flight. Bobby Zamora has scored one in 20 for Fulham, while Stoke’s Richard Cresswell is still looking for his first after 21 games.
Premier League Vital Signs as at Jan. 14
Pulse? Steady. Temperature? Normal, i.e. overheated. For those of you preparing to make your predictions, here’s an update on those other life-indicators, the Home/Away/Draw percentages.
|
|
06/07
|
07/08
|
08/09
|
08/09
|
08/09
|
08/09
|
|
|
|
|
7 wks
|
12 wks
|
17 wks
|
21 wks
|
|
Home
|
48%
|
46%
|
43%
|
46%
|
42%
|
43%
|
|
Draw
|
26%
|
26%
|
17%
|
19%
|
25%
|
26%
|
|
Away
|
26%
|
27%
|
39%
|
35%
|
33%
|
31%
|
November and December have seen the Draws creeping up. Has the arrival of Winter sapped the energy and enthusiasm of players who prefer warmer weather? Interestingly, the most successful team in the month of December (with four wins and a draw) was Aston Villa, who, with their eight Englishmen, are an exception in the modern Prem.
The number of goals per game has slipped back from 2.72 after 12 weeks to 2.56 now, which is slightly below last season’s average. All of this means 0-0s and 1-1s are occurring more often, but we’ll take a look Most Frequent Scores sometime soon...
Red Car(d)?
Did you hear about Cristiano Ronaldo’s car crash last week? I wouldn’t put much trust in the report below, but it did make me laugh:
"Witnesses at the scene of the crash stated that although Ronaldo’s Ferrari was only lightly bumped from behind, it flipped and rolled over ten times, spun around on the spot for ten minutes before all four wheels fell off and it burst into flames."
Until next week, friends,
Regards,
Prof. Statto