Five Spices From Chairman Damon
Log on to this page after each round of games for the lowdown on how each team fared. He’s harsh, but fair and you won’t find anything quite like it elsewhere. Enjoy our Chairman’s pithy post match analysis of the overpaid heroes and goats that make up the “Happy Band” of the EPL. If you're in the prawn sandwich and skim latte club, or part of the "Dippy Darling" brigade this column is not for you!!
Who's hot? Who's not? Who's left their bottle at home? Watch this space carefully as the season unwinds.
Who was hot before? Visit Damon's 2008/09 season archives to find out!
Previous Analysis:
Round Fourteen.... Round Thirteen.... Round Twelve.... Round Eleven.... Round Ten.... Round Nine
Aston Villa 2 - Arsenal 4
Arsenal see off a Villa fightback to earn a good win at Villa Park. The home side continue to be ravaged by injuries and struggled to contain their visitors in the game's opening phase, eventually going behind when Andrei Arshavin was alllowed to cut on from the left before beating Friedel five minutes before half time. When Samir Nasri volleyed in Arshavin's corner on the stroke of half time, the points looked in the bag for the visitors. The home team regrouped at the break, however, and Ciaran Clark smashed in a reply seven minutes after the restart, though was helped by an offside Jon Carew standing plumb in Arsenal keeper Lukasz Fabianski's line of vision. Marouane Chamakh then restored the Londoners' two-goal cushion when converting Thomas Rosicky's through ball but, with twenty minutes left, Clark grabbed a second when his header from Richard Dunne's nod-back went in off the bar. The Gunners managed to hold out and Jack Wilshire's far post finish from Chamakh's cross confirmed the win in the game's closing stages.
Bolton Wanderers 2 - Blackpool 2
In form Bolton are forced to come from two goals down to salvage a draw at home to Blackpool. In an entertaining match, the Seasiders struck first when Ian Evatt outjumped the Wanderers' defence to head home Elliott Grandin's corner just before the half hour. When the Tangerines repeated the trick three minutes before the hour, this time with Luke Varney getting his head to another Grandin corner, it looked as if Blackpool were on course to take another noteworthy scalp in what's currently a great season for them. Bolton had other ideas and, helped by their visitors' unwillingness to shut up shop, were back in the game with a quarter of an hour left, through substitute Martin Petrov's volley from the edge of the area. The momentum was now with the home side and Mark Davies finally bagged an equaliser a minute from time after Johan Elmander and Ivan Klasnic had picked their way through the Blackpool defence.
Everton 1 - West Bromwich Albion 4
The Baggies post the result of the weekend with a scalping of Everton at Goodison. Despite not starting strongly against an out-of-sorts Toffees side, the visitors took the lead on the quarter-hour when Paul Scharner headed his first Albion goal from Chris Brunt's corner. Everton briefly responded, with Victor Anichebe and Mikel Arteta forcing good stops from Scott Carson, but were two down after twenty-six minutes, with Brunt finding the top corner with a marvellous, curling free-kick. Tim Cahill restored Everton's hopes when heading a goal back, three minutes before the break, and the home side looked good value for an equaliser as they started the second half well. Their chances receded, however, when Arteta saw red for stamping on Gonzalo Jara, after the full-back had caught him with a poor challenge. Jermaine Beckford, still struggling in front of goal at this level, could still have brought his side level, only to spurn two good chances before Somen Tchoyi showed him how it's done with a terrific shimmy and curled finish to reestablish his side's two-goal lead with fifteen minutes left. Yousouf Malumbu made it four with three minutes still to go, when his shot cannoned in off Sylvain Distin's chest, and the midfielder picked up a yellow card for his celebrations which made him look very foolish just moments later when he received a second card for a foul on Steven Pienaar. The dismissal came too late to help the home side, who remain just two points outside the relegation places.
Fulham 1 - Birmingham City 1
Fulham and Birmingham produce perhaps the least-surprising result of the weekend with a draw at Craven Cottage. The first half was dominated by the Blues and they took a thoroughly-desered lead on twenty minutes, as Alexander Hleb slalomed his way through the Fulham half before releasing Sebastien Larsson to finish. With the home fans not slow in voicing their displeasure at the break, the Cottagers came out for the second half with more purpose and pulled level within seven minutes; Clint Dempsey heading in from Zoltan Gera's nod back. City were typically resolute in defence, willing to throw their bodies in the way of everything, and it was they who came closest to grabbing a winner when Scott Dann's powerful header crashed off the bar. As it is, they maintain their two point lead over their hosts, in turn just a point ahead of Wigan.
Manchester United 7 - Blackburn Rovers 1
Manchester United go top of the table in emphatic fashion after handing Rovers their backsides on a plate. The rout got underway inside two minutes, with Dimitar Berbatov turning home the ball after Wayne Rooney had provided the merest of flicks to Nani's free-kick. Park Ji-Sung doubled his side's lead on twenty-three minutes, poking the ball past Paul Robinson after a one-two with Rooney, and it was three just four minutes later when Berbatov latched onto Pascal Chimbonda's suicidal back pass and welted the ball home. The Bulgarian completed his hat-trick with the fourth, two minutes after the restart, hammering the ball high into the net from Nani's pull-back. The Portuguese winger netted the fifth himself just a minute later, cutting inside Chimbonda before finding the corner of the net. Just after the hour, it was six; Berbatov grabbing a fourth after Park's attempt was blocked by Samba. The striker's fifth followed with twenty minutes still remaining, with the ball falling kindly for him to finish from a narrow angle after he'd initially tried to put in Rooney. Christopher Samba headed some scant consolation with seven minutes left but, unbeaten in twenty-nine matches now, the Red Devils are starting to look ominous.
Newcastle United 1 - Chelsea 1
Newcastle hold Chelsea at St. James's Park as the Londoners lose top spot for the first time this season. United, clearly fancying their chances against a Blues' side who'd lost three of their previous four games, were out of the blocks sharply, looking to deny their visitors space all over the park. Their tenacity was rewarded when Alex's wayward backpass gifted Andy Carroll the opening goal on six minutes. The Chelsea midfield, as it has done whilst shorn of Michael Essien and Frank Lampard, was looking ponderous but it clicked into gear just before the break, with Florent Malouda eventually releasing Salomon Kalou to turn inside Sol Campbell and fire in a shot that clipped off Danny Simpson before finding the corner of the net. The goal swung the game's momentum the way of the visitors and Didier Drogba had the ball in the net, only to see his effort ruled out for an inadvertant handball, whilst Kalou produced one of the misses of the season when firing wide of an open goal, in a much-improved second-half performance. Newcastle maintained their own threat and Ashley Cole was forced into a goal-line clearance from Wayne Routledge but neither side proved able to find a winner.
Stoke City 1 - Manchester City 1
Stoke find a late equaliser to deny Manchester City a win at the Britannia. The Sky Blues returned to form after their swashbuckling performance at Fulham, virtual strangers to the Stoke penalty area in a first half that saw them regularly having to fend off the Potters' aerial bombardments. Stoke were unable to make the most of their chances, however, and the Mancunians improved after the break to at least compete in what remained an ugly game. With ten minutes remaining, Micah Richards produced a lovely piece of skill to sell Danny Simpson before firing across Asmir Begovic and break the deadlock. His creativity would be matched by Tuncay Sanli in the dying seconds, however, with the striker producing a slick back-heeled pass from Kenwyne Jones's flick-on to put in Matt Etherington, and the winger made no mistake in driving his shot past Joe Hart.
Tottenham Hotspur 2 - Liverpool 1
Tottenham grab a late winner to beat Liverpool, after coming from behind once more at White Hart Lane. Reds' manager Roy Hodgson is currently having to cope with the flying brickbats from elements of his club's support right now but his team put on a much-improved first half performance at Tottenham. Martin Skrtel fired the visitors ahead three minutes before half-time, after his initial header from a free-kick had dropped for him off team-mate David Ngog. His side should have been two up before the break, only for Maxi Rodriguez to critically lose control of the ball after being put through by Fernando Torres. Torres himself was denied either side of the interval by good tackles from Sebastien Bassong when, at full fitness, he'd expect to do better. Spurs came back and were awarded a penalty after Ngog had stupidly blocked a Gareth Bale free-kick with his arms, only for Jermain Defoe to screw his kick wide. They were, though, back on terms with twenty-five minutes to go, as a desperate Skrtel could only divert Luka Modric's cross into his own net after the Croatian had burst through a posse of Liverpool players down the left. With time running out, the Lillywhites found a winner. Peter Crouch flicked on Benoit Assou-Ekotto's hump out from the back and Aaron lennon caught Peter Konchesky on his heels to be first to the ball and beat a despairing Pepe Reina.
West Ham United 3 - Wigan Athletic 1
West Ham finally get another win under their belts as they pick up a vital three points at home to Wigan. With both teams down among the dead men, it was an understandably nervy start to the first half at Upton Park until Valon Behrami bundled home Frederic Piquionne's header to open the scoring eleven minutes before the break. The Hammers made it two, ten minutes into the second half, with Victor Obinna finally opening his account for the Eastenders with a good finish into the bottom corner from Piquionne's pass. Latics' boss Roberto Martinez made a double substitution and his move looked to have paid dividends when Tom Cleverly was brought down in the box by Danny Gabbidon. Only having been on the pitch a matter of seconds, however, Mauro Boselli made a hash of his spot-kick and Robert Green saved comfortably. United made the most of the reprieve and made the game safe with fifteen minutes left, as Scott Parker charged into the area to slide home Obinna's return ball. Cleverly pulled a goal back with a tidy finish with six minutes to go but it was never likely to spark a comeback.
Wolverhampton Wanderers 3 - Sunderland 2
Wolves atage a late show as they come from behind to take all three points against Sunderland at Molineux. Chances came and went at either end during a first half in which both sides struggled with the underfoot conditions. Five minutes into the second half, it was the home side who took the lead; Kevin Foley following up to batter the ball home after Craig Gordon had parried a Matt Jarvis drive. The visitors were level fifteen minutes later, with Darren Bent holding off Richard Stearman to collect Asamoah Gyan's flick-on and beat Wayne Hennesey. Ten minutes later and the Black Cats had taken the lead, with Danny Wellbeck extending his recent scoring run by heading in Phil Bardsley's cross. Wolves fought back hard, though, and Stephen Hunt restored parity when he smacked the ball in from close range after George Elokobi had made a nuisance of himself in the Sunderland box. With just a minute to go, the turnaround was completed, with substitute Sylvan Ebanks-Blake thrashing the ball into the net after being set up by Kevin Doyle. It looks as if we may have a competition at both ends of the table this season.