Five Spices From Chairman Damon 
Log on to this page after each round of games for the lowdown on how each team fared. He’s harsh, but fair and you won’t find anything quite like it elsewhere. Enjoy our Chairman’s pithy post match analysis of the overpaid heroes and goats that make up the “Happy Band” of the EPL. If you're in the prawn sandwich and skim latte club, or part of the "Dippy Darling" brigade this column is not for you!!
Who's hot? Who's not? Who's left their bottle at home? Watch this space carefully as the season unwinds.
Who was hot before? Visit Damon's 2008/09 season archives to find out!
Previous Analysis:
Round Twenty-Three.... Round Twenty-Two A.... Round Twenty-Two.... Round Twenty-One.... Round Twenty
Arsenal 1 - Manchester United 3
Manchester United win a surprisingly one-sided match at the Emirates' to stay within a point of the leaders. The visitors' main inspiration in a lively first half was, surprisingly, the back-in-favour Nani and the winger claimed most of the credit for the opening goal just after the half-hour. Picking up the ball on the right wing, the Portuguese looked to have been crowded out but tricked his way between two defenders before turning Cesc Fabreagas in the box and hanging up a cross to the back post that was intended for the incoming Park Ji-Sung. As it was, the cross didn't reach the South Korean as Manuel Almunia clumsily diverted the ball inside the far post for him. Within five minutes, the Mancunians were two up, with Wayne Rooney slamming his shot past Almunia from the edge of the area after being found by Nani on the end of a lighning fast break. Park made it three just seven minutes into the second half, running from his own half before dinking a calm finish past Almunia, and Arsenal weren't really at the races. They did get a goal back when Thomas Vermaelen's acrobatic volley clipped Wes Brown on its way in but the nature of this defeat certainly raises question marks against their chances of taking the title.
Birmingham City 1 - Tottenham Hotspur 1
City grab a late equaliser to take a share of the points at St. Andrew's. The visitors had enjoyed the lion's share of the possession during a first half that was a little light on goal-mouth action, with Birmingham's cussedness in defence once more on display. A bit of tinkering at half time opened the game up a little more for Spurs, though, with David Bentley, in particular, causing Liam Ridgewell plenty of problems down the visitors' right. The first goal, when it came, came down the left, however, with Gareth Bale's driven cross flicked on by Peter Crouch at the near post to Jermain Defoe, who smashed the ball past Joe Hart. As the time ticked away, it seemed Birmingham were going to suffer successive defeats after their long unbeaten run, until Ridgewell cropped up at the far post in injury time to steer home Cameron Jerome's header. Birmingham remain a hard side to beat.
Burnley 1 - Chelsea 2
Chelsea grind out a win at Turf Moor thanks to a late winner from under-fire skipper John Terry. The Londoners dominated the first half and took the lead on the half hour with a flowing move oout from the back; Petr Cech found Joe Cole with his throw and the midfielder's cross was cut back by Florent Malouda into the path of Nicolas Anelka, who made no mistake. Being in so much control appeared to lead to complacency as the sides started the second period, however, and Steven Fletcher made the most of a kind run of the ball to fire an equaliser past Cech with only five minutes on the clock. The Blues upped the pressure as they sought to retake the lead but were finding it difficult to find a way through until they won a corner with ten minutes left. Frank Lampard's cross was met at full belt by the centre-back, who planted a firm header past Brian Jensen in the Burnley goal to ensure his club end January top of the table.
Fulham 0 - Aston Villa 2
Villa pick up an excellent win at Craven Cottage to keep themselves in contention for a top-four finish. After a poor start, the game picked up half-way through the first period with Aston Villa clicking and Fulham very nearly taking the lead, only for Carlos Cuellar to clear Bobby Zamora's goal-bound effort over his own bar. Both goals came in a flurry of activity in the last five minutes of the first half. Gabriel Agbonlahor got across Chris Smalling to head in Stylian Petrov's cross in the fortieth minute, then doubled his tally four minutes later when Brede Hangeland got himself in a mess and couldn't prevent the striker from turning and converting Cuellar's ball into him. The Cottagers came out meaning business in the second half and had by far the better of things, with both Zoltan Gera and substitute David Elm coming close. Ultimately, they couldn't turn their overwhelming possession into goals and drop into the bottom half of the table for the first time in a long while.
Hull City 2 - Wolverhampton Wanderers 2
Wolves twice come back from a goal down to take a valuable point at the KC Stadium. In an entertaining game, Jan Venegoor of Hesselink put City ahead after twenty minutes, rifling home Jozy Altodore's lay-off from twenty yards. Wanderers came back but really only managed to win a succession of corners for their efforts and were struggling to create a clear chance. They were helped by their hosts five minutes into the second half when Stephen Hunt misjudged a ball he thought was going out of play, only to see it kept in by Ronald Zubar. His cross should have been dealt with quite comfortably by Anthony Gardner but the hapless centre-back completely mis-timed his kick and only succeeded in comically slicing the ball into his own net. Clearly grateful for the gift, Zubar returned the favour within three minutes by stupidly climbing all over Altidore in the area and giving Hunt the chance to put his side back in front from the spot, which the winger duly did. Wolves weren't done, though, and Matthew Jarvis volleyed home Kevin Foley's cross with twenty-five minutes left to level matters once more, to leave these sides still separated by a single point at the wrong end of teh table.
Liverpool 2 - Bolton Wanderers 0
Liverpool return to winning ways with a crucial win against Bolton at Anfield. The Reds are still looking less than convincing and needed Sotirios Kyriakos to clear a Chung-Yong Lee effort off the line after the midfielder had skinned the defence before rounding Pepe Reina. However, they took the lead ten minutes before the break when Alberto Aquilani headed Emiliano Insua's cross back across goal and Dirk Kuyt managed to mis-hit the ball into the net. David Ngog should have extended the lead as Bolton were hit on the break but could only put his effort over the bar with the goal gaping. A second goal did finally come with twenty minutes remaining, as Insua's shot took a wicked deflection off Kevin Davies to wrong-foot Jussi Jaaskelainen. Now with a firm hold on the game, Liverpool looked a much better side as the game played its way out and could well have extended their lead further. For now, though, the win will do as they look to ensure Champions' League participation for next year.
Manchester City 2 - Portsmouth 0
City mug Portsmouth at Eastlands to get back to winning ways. A poor first half saw the visitors good value for at least a point and they should have gone ahead mid-way through the period, only for Danny Webber to fail to connect on an Anthony Vanden Borre effort that came back down off the bar. Nothing is going right for Pompey this season, though, and City took the lead five minutes before the break when a fractionally offside Emmanuel Adebayor was able to bring down Gareth Barry's long ball and hit an unstoppable effort past David James. If that was harsh on the South Coast side, worse was to follow when Vincent Kompany buried a powerful header from Martin Petrov's corner in the dying moments of the half. The out-of-sorts Webber failed to reduce the deficit when presented with a good chance in the early minutes of the second period and that was as good as things got for his side, as City closed out the game with minimal fuss to finish the weekend just a point off fourth place with two games in hand.
Sunderland 0 - Stoke City 0
Honours even in a largely uneventful Monday night encounter at the Stadium of Light. Largely uneventful? Downright tedious, actually, with the only real talking point a did he/didn't he handball call against big Robert Huth. Still, it's a point nearer safety for both these sides.
West Ham 0 - Blackburn Rovers 0
An awful game at Upton Park ends in a stalemate that leaves the Hammers outside the drop zone purely on goal difference. There was plenty of endeavour on show but precious little quality, with the ball seeing a lot of air throughout. Morten Gamst Pedersen's free kick that came off the bar at the end of the half was as close as either team got to breaking the deadlock. Only with a quarter of an hour or so remaining did the game provide anything in the way of excitement, with a sudden flurry of end-to-end play that included an acrobatic Carlton Cole goal-line clearance from a Gael Givet attempt that appeared to strike a West Ham hand and Paul Robinson called into action at the other end to beat away an Alessandro Diamanti effort. Poor stuff on balance, though, and the sides probably got what they deserved from the game.
Wigan Athletic 0 - Everton 1
Everton's recovery continues with a narrow win from a lively game at Wigan. Both sides had chances in an evenly-contested first half, with Vladimir Stojkovic called upon to produce a couple of goos saves to deny Tim Cahill and Louis Saha and Hugo Rodallega a continual menace up front for the Latics. Tim Cahill scored what proved to be the winner just six minutes from the end, rising in typical fashion to head home Leighton Baines's corner. Charles N'Zogbia then almost grabbed what would have been a deserved equaliser deep into injury time, only for his long-range effort to crash back off Tim Howard's bar. Wigan remain an enigma this season, following performances like this one with ones like at White Hart Lane, and continue to be difficult to predict. Everton, meanwhile, look to be getting back to the level expected of them at the beginning of the season.
Fulham 1 - Portsmouth 0
Poor old Pompey lose narrowly once more in the last days of the latest regime. Portsmouth had the better of the first half chances but you know when things just aren't happening for a team when the opposing keepers start saving goal attempts with their arse, as Mark Schwarzer did with Frederic Piquionne's piledriver. For Fulham, new boy Stefano Okaka managed to head wide from about five feet with ten minutes of the half remaining and the miss heralded the start of an improvement for the home side. Bobby Zamora tested David James with a couple of headers and was then involved when the Cottagers took the lead with a quarter of an hour left. The striker was clearly, blatantly offside when Damien Duff squared the ball after dispossessing Mark Wilson and covering defender Tal Ben Haim had no choice but to go with him. When Ben Haim could then only redirect the ball across goal, Jonathon Greening strode into the acres of space behind him to tuck the ball away. Everything appears to be conspiring against Avram Grant's side at the moment.
Hull City 1 - Chelsea 1
Battling Hull hold the league leaders at the KC to close the gap on the crowd above them. An off-colour Chelsea struggled to get their passing game together in the face of some spirited Tigers pressing. The Londoners had been expected to win this game reasonably comfortably but were limited to just a couple of chances before the hosts took the lead on the half hour. As so often for Chelsea this season, it came from a set-piece as Steven Mayakoulo made the most of some clever shielding from his team-mates to head home Stephen Hunt's corner. The goal briefly spurred the Blues into some semblance of cohesion and, after Nicolas Anelka had been brought down on the edge of the area, Didier Drogba curled home the free-kick five minutes before the break to put the visitors level. As the second half progressed, Hull found themselves playing ever deeper but rarely looked in danger of conceding, aside from one Daniel Sturridge effort well kept out by Boaz Myhill, and continued to carry a threat, themselves. A well-earned point, then, for Phil Brown's side but, whilst a point ensures Chelsea are still two clear of Manchester United, Carlo Ancelotti is likely to consider these two valuable points dropped.